For the gay marriage debate:

Step 1: Go back in time and find the first guy to ever scribble the word 'marriage' into a U.S. document of law in the first place.

Step 2: Carve the first amendment directly onto his buttocks with a rusty scalpel.

Step 3: There is no step 3. You've already solved the damned problem. Church wants to refuse to marry gay couples? It's their right. Gay couples want to build their own church so that they can get married or worship in it? It's their right. Government wants to give tax breaks to couples raising children? Then it's your business!

It's illegal to let the church tell us who god says can and can't get legal benefits. So why is marriage a legal issue in the first place?

The bill of rights sure looks nice on paper. I wonder what it would be like if a government used it some time.

/rant